


Points of View

by princessofmind, roundandtalented



Category: Homestuck
Genre: HSWC, M/M, Prompt: POV, ace aradia is my lifeblood, match maker karkat vantas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-21
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-03-02 13:33:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2813789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princessofmind/pseuds/princessofmind, https://archiveofourown.org/users/roundandtalented/pseuds/roundandtalented
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Let’s review:</p>
<p>- They were both boys (an important part of the criteria)<br/>- They had both, at some point in their lives, had a thing for you (establishing a similarity, also important)<br/>- They both enjoyed playing video games<br/>- They were both huge nerds with interests ranging from comic books to fantasy novels and everything else in between<br/>- They were both obnoxious assholes</p>
<p>Oh.</p>
<p>Okay, maybe that last bullet point explains your problem.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Points of View

**Author's Note:**

> this is old as heck, but hey, it's cute so why not post it.

**Feferi**

 

“I can’t fuckin’ stand him.”

And okay, that was not even close to what you’d been expecting.

Because by all the logic in the universe, they should get along just fine. Boys were way easier than girls, and so long as you matched up the list of hobbies that they had, they could interact with just about anyone, regardless of age or social standing. Despite having spent most of your life around girls (like your single mother and big sister), you’ve always been right when it comes to the male gender. Call it a gift.

So Eridan and Sollux should have been instant friends.

And you’d kind of been counting on it, to be honest.

Let’s review:

\- They were both boys (an important part of the criteria)  
\- They had both, at some point in their lives, had a thing for you (establishing a similarity, also important)  
\- They both enjoyed playing video games  
\- They were both huge nerds with interests ranging from comic books to fantasy novels and everything else in between  
\- They were both obnoxious assholes

Oh.

Okay, maybe that last bullet point explains your problem.

You sigh and rub your temples, looking at the boy sitting on your bed with the most heartbreakingly betrayed look on his face and trying to resist the urge to pelt him with a pillow. “Well how was I supposed to know that you wouldn’t get along?” you ask, huffing and puffing your cheeks out just a little to let him know precisely how disgruntled you feel.

“How was I supposed to know that you’re such a poor judge’a character after knowin’ me for all these years?” he asks, and okay, maybe there was a point there too.

Because you’ve known Eridan Ampora since the two of you were hiding under tables at your parent’s fancy dinner parties and stealing all the shrimp cocktail and cream puffs, laughing at the waiters and trying to guess who a person was just from the shoes you could see behind the tablecloth. And just as much as he was back then, he’s a well-meaning guy who just unfortunately rubs everyone the wrong way, which was why you took it upon yourself to suggest one Sollux Captor as his lab partner for the semester in biology.

“You two would be perfect together!” you’d said, in all your naivete. “He’s good with computers, so writing up the reports will be a breeze, and since you’re pretty good with all the technical terms, you should breeze through the semester with no trouble!”

“Yeah, but will we get along?” he’d asked, voice full of skepticism as he adjusted his scarf for the umpteenth time in your closet mirror.

“Of course!”

It kind of makes you want to bang your head against the wall.

Because retrospectively, you should have known better. Eridan is proud as a peacock, and preens like one too. He takes personal hygiene very seriously, as well as fashion choices; two things that have never ranked high on Sollux’s list of priorities. And Sollux has absolutely no respect for social standings, something that you’ve always found endearing but you know would make Eridan want to back over him with his Porsche.

“Okay, maybe this was a really dumb idea on my part,” you say sheepishly.

Eridan looks vindicated, because it’s very rare that you actually admit to fucking up (since you rarely fuck up in the first place!), and you just sigh and sit on the bed next to him, giving him a nudge with your knee. “But look, mister, that doesn’t mean that you can just blow him off. You’re already stuck working together for this project, so maybe you could make the best of it and try getting to know him?”

“I don’t need to try getting to know him,” he says, looking like you’d just suggested he eat an entire lemon whole. “He’s rude an’ uncultured an’ sloppy an’ thinks he’s better than me on account’a the fact that he can do some fancy things with computers, big fuckin’ whoop.”

“I’m sure he’d have some similarly scathing things to say about you.”

You are, of course, ignored. “An’ I don’t know where he gets off on talkin’ to me in that high-and-mighty tone of voice, like he thinks I’m the pitiful one!”

“Uh-huh.”

“An’ why the hell does he not own anythin’ but t-shirts?! It’s an atrocity, that’s what it is! He’s an adult, so it’s time for him to start actin’ like one!”

[](http://s1138.photobucket.com/user/caitbmw/media/hmmm_zps57349958.png.html)

art by [donut](http://schliber.tumblr.com/)

 

Wow, he’s getting really worked up about this.

You’re squinting at him from behind your glasses, and it stops him halfway through his tirade. “What?” he asks, sounding affronted.

“Nothing,” you say eventually, waving a hand dismissively to tell him to carry on with his bitching.

For someone who couldn’t stand Sollux, Eridan sure spent most of his time during their project talking about him.

 

**Aradia**

 

You’d been friends with Sollux Captor since the two of you got sent to the hall for collectively getting two tables of eight year olds to eat the paste during arts and crafts. Just the hall, and not the principal’s office, because even at the age of eight, Sollux had been good at talking his way out of trouble.  
He’d been smarter than the rest of the class, and you’d been the sweetheart no one had expected to be utter hellspawn.  
You made for a pretty good team, all things considered. Sollux Captor and Aradia Megido: the Dynamic Duo, teachers called you. Sollux like that a lot.

He helped you with homework, you beat up every kid that tried to bully him. It just worked.

And everyone tells you that you don’t stay friends with the kids you grew up with- high school changes people, college destroys any life they have left. But there’s always exceptions. The two of you are good exceptions.

Fifteen plus years of being exceptions means you know him right down to his terrible, lazy, fusspot core. 

He’s shitty at making friends and shitty at keeping a job. He doesn’t do laundry until he has to, has a terrible diet, and has even worse taste in people he finds attractive.  
You’ve seen a parade of mistakes, over the years. On his part, on his partners’ parts. On his partners parent’s parts too because wow, talk about spoilt brats.  
But, of all the spoilt brats who have ever caught his eye, this one’s not so bad. Well, he’s bad. He could be worse, though. 

Sollux will deny it ‘til the day that he dies, but you knew the first time he said the name ‘Eridan Ampora’, complete with sassy head tilt and scrunched up face as he said it, that poor boy was already in his sights.  
But no, Sollux had insisted, that this kid, introduced to him by Feferi, bless her soul, was the worst person he’d ever met in his life.  
You knew, because if you know anything about Sollux, his default reaction to change is panic, then anger, you would be hearing much more about some prissy asshole who knew shit about computers, but sure thought he did.

You’d almost taken bets with Karkat on how long it would take Sollux to clue in that he craved Eridan’s attention- good and bad. He wanted to best him, wanted to show off, wanted Eridan to ask him about anything, just so he could talk to him under the disguise of bragging.  
But you knew Sollux Captor. You knew how he went about relationships and how no one ever seemed to keep his interest long- that was his problem, after all. That he simply got bored. With people, with jobs, with time and space.  
But this prissy kid that Feferi had dumped into his life, had his interest. And kept it. And it took about eight months before Sollux came into your apartment one evening, and just sat on your couch, head in his hands, in utter disbelief with himself.

“I want him.” He had said, shaking his head like he was rejecting the words even as they came out of his mouth. “He’s awful and I want him.”  
You did what you always do when he’s distressed with life and himself.  
You laughed at him.

He’d thrown a pillow at you that night. Yelled and almost stormed out the door when you said it took him long enough. But eventually he’d settled down, bumped his shoulder against yours on the couch, and genuinely asked you for help.  
You couldn’t really offer him much. Advice, really. That was it. And you weren’t even the right person to ask about romance and feelings. You’re not really experienced with either, nor will you probably ever be. You’re good at turning people down, but that’s certainly not what he was after.  
You tried to think like Karkat and just felt exhausted. You tried to think like Feferi and felt like you needed more coffee for that.  
So you’d thought like you.

"Well, when I want to keep people around me, I tell them so. If I want company, I invite someone over- though you’re always welcome. You get special privileges." He’d laughed at that, smug asshole that he is. "I tell people what I enjoy about them so that I can enjoy it more."

Sollux sat on your couch with you, for well over an hour, telling you what he liked about Eridan. Every single thing he came up with was a tangled mess of ‘ _I like when he does this, but then he does this and it pisses me off but it’s kind of endearing anyway_ ’.  
They’re both a disaster on legs. Walking, talking, _sassing_ disasters who argue for fun and don’t sleep normal hours because they’d rather yell at each other while playing games online.

It took him a while, but you got a text from him one afternoon- it’s only 2pm, so you knew he’d normally be sleeping still. All the message said was ‘ _here goes_ ’, and you’d immediately known he’d not slept yet, having been thinking over his words instead.  
You’d sent him back a ‘ _good luck_ ’, but, if anything, you know Sollux Captor. And he’s always been very good at talking his was in and out of trouble.

 

**Cronus**

 

Your little brother’s friends have always been the kind of kids that get on your nerves. Well, the guys at least. For a fucking goody-two shoes loser who spends his free time reading and playing fantasy video games, he seems to end up with a lot of hot female friends.

Not that he’s been interested in the ladies since about eighth grade, but whatever. Their cute behinds and pretty faces are wasted on him, but you can at least appreciate those from afar.

Regardless, this new kid, some Captor kid. He says lab partner, you say groupie. Same difference really. The kid digs him, judging by how Eridan vents to you about his teasing and pestering. Its like, how little boys flirt with girls in their classes. They pretty much bully them just to get their attention, because at that age they just want the attention, good or bad. That’s this guy, by the sounds of it.

And your brother is too clueless to notice that he’s into him too, because he fucking enjoys it. He comes up with witty comebacks hours later, things he can dig right back with, like it’s the only thing he has in his week to look forward to.  
Honestly, you thought they were already dating at first, just because of how much he talked about him, plus the amount of time they spent together.

“I’ve gotta go meet Sol in the lab. Won’t be back til late.”

Yeah. Lab. Huh. Sure.

Except, he always came home more frustrated than when he left, so eventually you figured he actually was his lab partner, and not some guy he was just fucking every week in the Bio wing. How ‘bout that.

Eridan brought him home one night, and you knew immediately this kid was the kind of guy you’d run into on Reddit or the depths of 4chan. An Internet Hate Machine. Of _course_ he’s Mituna’s younger brother- you should have expected no less. He’s the smarter of the two, though. You’ll give him that.

“Fuck off Cro,” Eridan says it the moment he catches you peering around the corner of the living room. “He doesn’t want to meet you.”

“Sure I do.” “ _Sure_ he does.”

 

The second he meets your gaze, he obviously changes his mind.

“Wow, is that what you’d look like if you kept up with the hair gel bullshit?” He’s got his laptop in on his legs, glow lighting up his glasses. Wow, didn’t think it would be some nerd with a half-assed attempt at a beard that got your little brother so riled up every week. Whatever floats his boat, you guess.

“Fuck you. Incoming on your left.”

They both sit, playing World of Warcraft on your couch, until three AM. They bicker and yell and snip little names at each other, but every time you pass them to go have a smoke on the balcony, they seem to have scooched a little closer together.

Eridan drives him home eventually, and when he gets back you meet him in the kitchen for the usual twenty questions.

“So what’s the deal with Nerd-Lord?”

“He’s a nerd, who happens to be one of the smartest in my class.” Eridan opens the refrigerator like he’s got something to look for in there, but you know he doesn’t eat anything after 8pm. Kid’s too tight on his figure, always worrying about his waistline like people actually care about that kinda shit.

“A nerd who’s dick you wanna suck pretty bad, by the look of it.” He glares at you over the fridge door. “You wanna touch DarthVader’s dong, don’t lie t’me.”

He slams the thing shut and opens the freezer. You see him grab the ice cream, and then go for a spoon from the drawer. You know your brother pretty well, and ice-cream means he’s actually upset and doesn’t want to deal with your harassing him about the thing that’s upsetting him. Which means you’ve _actually_ struck a nerve.

“He’s just my lab partner.” He says, right before he heads down the hall to his room.

Lab Partner. _Huh_. Not for long.

 

**Karkat**

 

It took both of them way too long to figure out they genuinely enjoyed each other’s company. Like, _way_ too long. You could see it at four months of bickering at, _and about_ , each other almost constantly.  
Apparently they didn’t see it until around eight or nine. They’ve always been pretty awful at knowing themselves- they leave that to you and the girls.  
Still. You’re glad you didn’t bet Aradia because she would have won when they were still bitching at six.  
You actually get along really well with both of them. You’d known Eridan since orientation day- Vantas and Ampora are no where even near each other alphabetically, but, you got stuck in the same group for the Saturday presentations. You’d both lead your team to victory, and ended up fast friends.

 

Sollux you’ve known since about half way through first year, when he was on the same dorm floor as you. One day you just _had_ to ask him about the two laptops in his arms all the time when you ended up next to him in the elevator. Like, who needs two even? Him, apparently. One for gaming, one for school work. The school one was an ancient piece of shit, though- his words, not yours.

They’re your best friends.  
Closest friends.  
 _Trashbag_ friends. 

They’re awful and hilarious and you wouldn’t trade them for the world. So of course once you noticed the romantic chemistry between them, all you wanted was for the two of them to bump uglies.  
You’re. Maybe a little invested in getting good matches to do that. Its why you’re in your field of study, after all. Professional match-maker, Karkat Vantas. You take pride in getting the right people to fuck, add that shit to your resume for once you actually get your degree- it’s an awful mix of sexuality courses and psychology. You’re going to be paying off student loans forever, but, hey. That's life.

Aradia agreed with you though. About Eridan and Sollux. And Feferi at least said she could see where you were coming from. So there was that.  
You weren’t completely misled in thinking they should, at bare minimum, maybe have a drunken romp.  
So for the better portion of eight months, you listened to them whine about each other, sass each other when the group of friends you called your own went out to the movies, and eventually, they straight up started flirting.  
But neither of them would talk about _that_. They wouldn’t admit to it, not to you. But you knew.  
And then one night you receive a text from each of them, completely panicking.

“ _He likes me back???_ ”  
“ _Might date Douchelord 9000_ ”

What was this, fucking elementary school? They were two adults! Both of them in their early twenties!  
“ _Fucking kiss him then! It’s not hard!_ ”  
You maybe almost threw your phone out the window of your bedroom on the eighth story of your apartment building.

Thank fuck they didn’t text you what that led to immediately after. You were grateful for that. Mostly because you found out later that they’d texted the girls instead.

They act like they’re an old married couple. The kind that bickers over restaurant menus, parking spots, anything. But then Sollux will just, scoop up Eridan’s hand while they’re walking somewhere, and he’ll go bright red and try not to smile too big.  
They start out really rocky. Like they don’t know how to talk to each other in any way other than yelling, so their conversations are stilted sometimes. But you walk in on a really sweet moment at the campus coffee shop at some point- the two of them holding hands under the table, laptops out but ignored in favour of Sollux telling a story and Eridan laughing along with him.

[ ](http://s1138.photobucket.com/user/caitbmw/media/sketchlines_zps0943706d.png.html)

You actually turned around and went to get coffee and wifi elsewhere.

They sort of, fell into the usual relationship bullshit after that. Its cute, if you’re being honest. They usually sit together, sometimes across from each other so they can kick at each other’s feet. Eridan picks Sollux up from work now, drives him to class if he’s late getting out the door and has the time. You have it on good authority that they fucked in the chemistry lab after hours once.  
They have a couple big fights, but they’re over stupid misunderstandings, Sollux not talking about his feelings, and Eridan talking too much. Them stuff.

One lasts a whole day, the other maybe a few hours. The day one was the worst, and it was actually the simplest issue. But Eridan spent the night moping on your couch anyway while you reminded him that Sollux still loved him very much, and that as soon as he was home from work, they were going to have a long talk and sort their shit.  
You’d been right, of course. But he’d still cried a lot and that was shitty, but, that’s long term relationships, you guess. There’s always bumps in trying to figure out how to be awesome together.  
But you knew both of them, you knew them to be wonderful idiots and hopelessly in love with each other, even if they were a bit shy about admitting it.

And the best part about the two of them sorting out their issues and actually getting together, is that it fits into your group of friends like that’s how they always were. They still bicker and argue, but it’s less tense and more playful because they know each other’s boundaries.

One night, after a few drinks and once the boys are passed out on the couch together, you bet Aradia that they’ll be engaged in three years. Its probably a stupid, sappy move on your part, but, you’re really confident in your prediction.

She says she’ll take that bet, on the grounds that she knows Sollux, and marriage isn’t his deal.

But, you know Eridan to be a hopeless romantic at heart. Sollux loves him more than he lets on, and is easy to persuade with the right motivation behind an argument.  
So her fifty bucks has your name on it, you’re sure of that.


End file.
